Jennifer Aniston, InStyle

Yes she’s 5′ 6″, though to some people in the world that’s tall! She is one of the hottest women to ever walk the face of the earth, she’s funny, and she can act! For years America and the whole world watched Jennifer Aniston on one of the longest running hit NBC sitcom, Friends, through the various fazes and looks of Rachel Green. How many movies was that she was in with just the 236 episodes of Friends, then she’s been in various hit movies too. America loves Jennifer Aniston, they always have. Then there was of course the signature Rachel hair style that every woman in American tried to copy at one time, where all they had to do was say “Give me the Rachel”, then soon after they could act like a slightly ditzy rich girl, and it was cool.

Posted in Editorial | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Adriana Lima, Kia Motors

Ok, Kia has kinda stepped over the line here (now they wish they would list the agency that made this for street cred). The movie poster painted look is cool, don’t get me wrong, though this paint job doesn’t look anything like Adriana Lima (no I don’t mean she couldn’t be a typical white trash rock band if she dressed that way or made lame songs, or a Nazi Punk KKK and or Nazi KKK Crocofloridaryan glades boxer). For stuff like that, can’t you just paint a picture? I mean do they even have to be standing there in a photograph to then paint them to hell? Adriana Lima is a an object of perfection in too many ways to describe in this write up, though this advertisement only serves as an attribute to make Adriana Lima feel like she is not. She looks really hot as usual in the actual Kia commercial video footage though.

Let me guess, the ad agency that created this is model ideal, not Adriana Lima? LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Idiots. Wahh, now they gonna cwy and start a witle fight club because they think they are the creme, and they keep asking you if you’d like some, while raping Adriana Lima in this years figure projection booth. Wahh, we waahv wots of fonts!, hmmph. Or maybe they think in some crazy form of perception that they in some way look as good as Adriana Lima before or after they created this ad campaign? This painted Kia advertisement alone reveals pure insanity for a number of reasons (other than the fact that someone put a backwards logo on it next to that UFC weirdy). What does this ad say about Kia Motors? Straight up 1980’s burger war, in skinny jeans. Get ’em you enter sandman leprechaun little people with angel dust. Get some lame model to pose for this kind of shyte. Adriana Lima obviously isn’t your kind of run of the mill. Whoever art directed this campaign obviously loves the theme of the dual connotation, constant left to right jumping attitude of, and this is nothing more than a forge with that in mind, facilitating only to make a smoking hot women like Adriana Lima feel like she is a rhyme scheme model NOT all that. She can not help being all that and making your mind naut just from looking at any Adriana Lima picture (other than this Kia picture).

Someone, somewhere, didn’t ask “Why the hell is Adriana Lima painted to hell?”. (Right before the person that painted this answers you say) “That’s a rhetorical question, you’re fired. There are probably 500,000 people in Asia alone that can do your job better for less, that I can find in the next 10 days, and that is plenty of time for the next project you were going to work on. Lesson learned. You too Heir Art Director, hit the road in your new Kia. Even better that you 2 car pooled today. I’m you’re getting a good look at the car, that is what it looks like too”.!


Posted in Campaign | Tagged | Leave a comment

Candice Swanepoel

OMG. That is all you can say here. Candice Swanepoel pre-show at the Stella McCarntney show in Paris. Have you ever seen a face so perfect? Usually this is obvious, and you combine that with Candice’s perfect body, and you’ve gone to heaven, though now you know. She’s not just for runway modeling, she’s not just for Victoria’s Secret, she’s not just a model, she is a Goddess. THE Goddess of all. This is what God looks like ladies and gentleman. Ok I’m going a bit far there, though this is one of God’s most perfect creations. If only Candice’s eye color was green. Then I know it would sound politically incorrect in an apartheid way too, however I’m sure that Candice’s birth is the essence of what brought about the fall of the apartheid.

Candice Swanepoel

Posted in No MakeUp Sexy | Tagged | Leave a comment

Izabel Goulart, Blanco

As if Izabel Goulart isn’t a prime example of good jeans alone, the aviator glasses really top off the set, while the perfectly crafted Blanco Jeans rock the show.


Posted in Campaign | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Katie Holmes, H. Stern

Katie Holmes for sure has got an original all her own kind of hotness. She’s got that down to earth one of the very hottest women in the room charm going for her, she’s got an illustrious kind of eroticism, I mean exoticism , then a pure confident sweetness. She’s a seriously hot woman that everyone thinks is cool, really fun, then she is this stunning goddess too, that no one can take their eyes off of, everyone mesmerized in┬áKatie’s control, completely under Katie’s spell. No one else could look this hot, wet and rolling around, if even on a simulated Hollywood beach.

Katie HolmesKatie HolmesKatie HolmesKatie HolmesKatie Holmes

Posted in Campaign | Tagged | Leave a comment

Isabeli Fontana, Much-a-like The Mango (2011)

So you’ve been out for the night, you’re on your way home, approaching the gates of your mansion, then what do we have here? Isabeli Fontana. She’s highly jealous of where you might of just been, though when a women this hot is jealous, it’s quite alright. She’s mad at you though, so she makes you go out and take pictures of all the latest Mango clothing she’s just purchased. You then sell the photos to Terry Richardson .

Isabeli Fontana MangoIsabeli Fontana MangoIsabeli Fontana Mango

Isabeli Fontana MangoIsabeli Fontana MangoIsabeli Fontana Mango

Posted in Editorial | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Kate & Michelle

Here┬áKate & Michelle are together, where after I was personally on the scene and they invited me to full on manaja twa. Did I just say that out loud? No, ok. Anyways, the manaja twa was just a rumor and it wasn’t the night of my life that I still haven’t fully recovered from. Both of them are much more sexy in person, let me tell you. That butler might of suspected something, though I think he had his eye on the Prince, so it was our little secret until some loud mouth wrote about it in an article on some website named

Posted in Impromptu | Leave a comment